Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
