i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
