just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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