I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
