Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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