Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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