hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
