names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
