His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize