they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
