i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
