I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
