Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
