what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
