Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
