someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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