i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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