I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
smell my finger.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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