youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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