the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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