It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
