Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
