he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
