dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
