did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
