another moral hangover. fuck.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Ladies don't puke and tell
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize