You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
