Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
