i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
