I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
