his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize