well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
