at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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