Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm too high and old for this...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize