He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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