i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
