Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I checked into jail on foursquare
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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