More tranny stories later!
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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