I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize