someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
cat food counts as protein by the way
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
