I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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