Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize