Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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