i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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