Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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