Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
