So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
