butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
