No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
