she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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